Why Dating Your Best Friend Is A Good IdeaSeveral years ago, I started dating my best friend. At the time, it made perfect sense. We were inseparable, we had so much in common, we were extremely close, and when we realized we had feelings for each other that surpassed being just friends, it seemed almost silly not to date each other. Especially since we were both single and had been single for a while — a factor that we didn't take into consideration as something that was weighing heavily on our decision. Needless to say, it didn't work out. And, in the process, we lost each other.
That's also why friends with benefits rarely go back to being just friends. If you've ever broken up with a friendyou know it's just as painful — if not more so — than breaking up with a partner. Now think about losing your partner and you best friend forever because you the two of you decided to give a relationship a try.
Isn't the thought alone painful enough? It's definitely not a loss many people would want to risk experiencing, because it's double the pain.
While in the moment you might be able to convince yourselves that you're making the right decision and it's going to work out, it's important to weigh the pros and cons, and weigh them realistically. Even if you are a natural risk taker, is this a risk worth taking? Are you willing to, literally, lose it all? No matter what your physical chemistry might be sayingit's important to step outside the scenario and see it clearly. Once you sleep with your best friend, you're heading down a road with no U-turn.
It's far easier to spot red flags early on in a relationship with someone who isn't your best friend. With our best friends, we tend to make allowances for them and let them get away with things that, no way in hell, we'd let others get away with when it comes to dating us. Because of this, you won't see the glaring red flags.
While you might be able to dismiss this by telling yourself that you know everything you need to know about your best friend now partner, there's a distinction that needs to be made: being just friends and dating someone reveals different sides of people. You may know your best friend like the back of your hand, but you don't know what it's like to date your best friend.
When I first started sleeping with my best friend, before we "officially" started dating, my therapist would tell me over and over again that you're not supposed to know what your best friend looks like or sounds like when they orgasm. She definitely had a point there. Also, the flip side of that is that you may not want the person you're dating to know the details your best friend knows. They know who you may have had an affair with. They know all your deepest, darkest secrets.
This is a tough premise on which to build a romance. Jan 11, Jenny - TotallybookedBlog rated it really liked it. Oh, how we loved Bram when he went headfirst into woo mode to finally try and win over Julia, but the side-splitting moments between the buddies and the banter between Linus and Bram really did hit the spot. Or ha he? Talk about passion and romance! This guy had it in spades! Whilst we did love so much about this book, there were moments we became frustrated with Julia and her pragmatic ways.
Honestly, how much convincing did she need about Bram. A blind man could see he was the one for her, and for too long she let her head rule her heart, much to our annoyance and made the story drag a little. This book is everything you could wish for in a rom-com. View 2 comments. Jan 06, Ilsa Madden-Mills added it.
Dec 19, Ri rated it it was amazing. If I ever doubted this author and her ability to write before I sure don't now. Not that I ever really did.
Dating your best friend is not the easiest decision to make as it can jeopardize the friendship that you built for years. Read on to know if you should do it. Yes, you are taking a risk on your friendship by dating. get more emotionally complex than your friendship ever was, and that's a good thing. Here are some concrete truths you need to know to feel confident that dating your best friend makes perfect sense.
Yet, I keep thinking to myself she cannot stay perfect but after this book, she might have elevated to that status. She took it to a whole new level with this story. However, there was something new to this book. There was a vulnerability in it with both characters. I think that is why I adored Bram the way that I did. He wasn't alpha sure he was confident but not in a smug waynor did he have a mouth so filthy that it would take a lifetime of soap to clean out.
Instead, he was genuine and true.
5 Things to Know Before Dating Your Best Friend
He was resolved in knowing that Julia, Jules to him, was the finish line. She was everything. I adored seeing him unabashed in going to any lengths to show him that. Julia, sweet lord this girl. I adored her and her quirky characteristics.
Together they truly were the perfect match. I didn't need certain colors to match them up to know this. They just clicked. I loved how they interacted with each other and tried to trick the other in confessing things to catch the other in a lie. This book isn't on the steamy side and didn't have it until much later in the book so keep that in mind if you are looking for something with a lot of sex. Sometimes the anticipation is much better than reading every other page of steam and that is true in this case.
There were so many humorous moments in the story.
I won't give spoilers but can I just say that I will always think of this author when I see or hear about a dragon?
I was rolling. In true fashion, this author has woven her magical unicorn spell over me and I am enchanted.
There is a reason she is my go-to RomCom author.
Dec 17, Kahea rated it it was amazing Shelves: books-readcollege5-starsquirky-femalesarcromantic-comedycontemporarybest-friends-siblingfictionopposites-attract. Question first? Who else winced while reading steps one through three?? Cause I sure as shit did.
I loved Julia and Bram. Julia is that compelling mix of shy, thoughtful sassy and snarky with a good dose of an extremely observant wallflower most of the time.
When dating your best friend
And though it was all kinds of slow burn, the chemistry between them was intense, so when things finally stopped being slow, it was all kinds of smexy goodness and just showed that they were a perfect match in every way. Thankfully, they both figure things out and loved where they ended up. From the way the story played out to the interesting situations that occur throughout the story to Julia and Bram themselves, this was a great story. But, the cherry on top of this sundae belongs to three of the supporting cast of characters.
Roarke, Rath and Linus were kind of everything.
Bram was one of those heroes who jumps off the page and into your heart almost from the start. While there was no doubt the man was a bit misguided, his heart was in the right place and he was dedicated to winning the heart of his 4. I did like her and I got that she was pretty much an introvert, but and while highly intelligent she lacked a lot of common sense social skills. While they spent some time together with Rath being his best friend and her big brother, their interactions were limited and she always seemed to barely tolerate him which I believe was actually her trying to hide her attraction to him.
I loved how during the course on her interviewing him for her matchmaking skills, he made sure she understood everything he would put into a relationship and everything anyone who was involved with him could expect which amped up the attraction between them and added to the slow burn of their romance.
Told from dual points of view, I feel that readers will gain great insight into both of these characters and their motivations for the way they live their lives and approach their relationships. This book would not have been the same without the supporting characters and I feel confident that at some point we will see Rath, Roark, and hopefully Linus again in the future.
Review copy provided for a voluntary review. Bram Scott was at times a bit obnoxious while others the perfect freaking gentleman. It was those moments where he opened his heart that had me swooning. I didn't particularly like her 4.
Are you wondering if you should date your best friend? Here's how to decide if it's the right choice for you. Here with all the joys and pitfalls of dating a friend, the EliteSingles magazine has 5 Things You Need to Know Before Dating Your Best Friend!. It sounds like the ideal, but the truth is that dating your best friend (either type) can come with a variety of challenges all its own. While this can be a very.
I didn't particularly like her not following her heart nor acting on her feelings for Bram. She was closed off at times yet she was completely obvious. This book was steamy and at times had me pulling my hair, but I loved the moments of shared intimacy between Bram and Julia so much! Meghan Quinn once again proves she is the queen of romantic comedy! Feb 04, Alaina rated it liked it Shelves: ng-group-challengefictionromancekindle-unlimitedcontemporaryfebruarynew-adult.
It's about a forbidden kind of romance, best friend dating your sister kind. In it, you will meet Bram and Julia. Their bantering was cute. Well, okay Julie was the frustrating character. Their romance was meh.
Nothing really stuck out to me but I ended up still finishing this book. I don't know what Bram saw in Julia.
I don't understand why she was acting the way that she was in this book. Again, frustrating - super super frustrating. Overall, it was cute and predictable. I'm glad that I'm done with it. Dec 15, Dana rated it it was amazing. Bram and Julia are one of my number one book couples!!!! I have just added a new BBF to my harem Bram Scott has taken the coveted spot at the very top!!!
Jan 03, Kennedy Ryan added it. Jul 02, Fiona Fog rated it it was amazing Shelves: book-seriescontemporarychick-litromancerom-com. When Bram first met his best friends little sister in college she intrigued him. Or maybe it was the tube socks who knew but from that moment on little Julia was on his radar. He couldn't stay away.
I adored the bro-ship these two have going on but she also found him attractive. Bram is one sexy guy. And what I liked about him and his character he was not a douche he was likeable.
He tri When Bram first met his best friends little sister in college she intrigued him. He tried to get Julia to go out with him in college but it never happened. And he let it slide.ADVICE ON DATING YOUR BEST FRIEND?
But ten years have gone by and he now see's his chance to try again. Julia earned her doctorate and she now runs an exclusive match-making agency in New York. She's proud of what she's accomplished. When Bram approaches her about signing up because he's looking for the one she's immediately suspicious. Why now? From here it is a non-stop roller coaster of laughter. That test she has all her clients fill out?
Hell just from reading it I would have done the same thing Bram did. Bram never wavered in his pursuit of Julia. The sweetness this guy rocked and his cockiness made him endearing. His friendship with Rath and the third in their duo Rourke that alone brought countless laughs. It was steamy, Bram know's his way around the bedroom and a woman's body. An entertaining read, no drama! Which is a plus.
Jan 03, Saira Moodley BookedMercy rated it liked it Shelves: three-starsfriends-to-loversmillionaire-heroa-lot-of-banterexpected-more-from-this-bookhero-manwhore. Arc provided in exchange for an honest review 3 stars "I have a stupid-as-shit crush on my best friend's sister. But this book did have funny dialogue which made me give it an extra star.
And the writing was good.
Personally i just needed a lil more from this book. It is no longer a friendship, and you will find yourself with more responsibilities than you had in the friendship. You can either be lovers or best friends but not both. When you have a best friend, you will also have a circle of friends that revolves around your friendship. When you get into a relationship with your best friend, this circle will most certainly have sides that they picked long before the relationship began.
Should the relationship fail, you will not only lose your best friend but all of the friends that side with your best friend as well. You need to keep this in mind before getting involved with your best friend.
Having a best friend means always having someone to lean on when you are going through difficult or frustrating times.
Watch When You're In Love With Your Best Friend 25 Things You'll Understand If The Thought Of Dating Freaks You The Fuck Out. When you start dating your best friend, it's exciting and scary at the same time. You know this person well, and they're already your go-to pal. Several years ago, I started dating my best friend. At the time, it made perfect sense. We were inseparable, we had so much in common, we.
What happens, however, when your best friend becomes your significant other? Although you will still be able to vent to them about some things, all of the frustrating moments that you have with them will have to be discussed with someone else.
If you have no one else to turn to, this can be even more difficult to deal with. If you must start a relationship with your best friend, make sure you have another friend to fall back on. In friendship, there is often more than enough space, and you only see each other as often as you both want to.
With a relationship, there is a lot more work that needs to be put in and a lot more quality time spent together. This quality time may alter the way that you see your best friend, and it may cause you to like them less than you had when you had more space from them. So, is dating your best friend a good idea? The truth is that it all depends on your situation. If you both feel the same way towards each other and you think that the bond is strong enough to move forward, then the relationship should work out.
If you and your best friend are not on the same page when it comes to a relationship and you haven't spent any quality time together for long periods of time, it will most likely end the friendship. Read the situation and proceed with caution before you make a move. Do you need more advice when it comes to dating your best friend?